love the moment

At some point you surrender I'm going to be a happy idiot And struggle for the legal tender Where the ads take aim and lay their claim To the heart and the soul of the spender And believe in whatever may lie In those things that money can buy Though true love could have been a contender Are you there? Say a prayer for the Pretender Who started out so young and strong Only to surrender Jackson Browne, "The Pretender" I remember the various younger versions of myself. I remember the silly boy who many loved and others pitied. I remember the young man suffering with depression when there were no words to describe the pain and no one who understood or gave notice. I remember the sometimes smart college student who achieved success while learning very little. And a graduate who began an adult life without sufficient understanding of either the game or the rules. I remember the desperately lonely, hormone-driven 20 something who was to...

The Kiss of the Spider Woman is a 1985 Brazilian-American drama film directed by Argentine-born Brazilian director Héctor Babenco, and adapted by Leonard Schrader from the Manuel Puig novel of the same name. William Hurt, Raúl Juliá, Sônia Braga, José Lewgoy, and Milton Gonçalves star in the leading roles. (From Wikipedia) I'm not sure when I saw this movie. I'm not even sure where I was when I saw it. But, the one thing I will never forget is its impact upon me. I was - at the time - still a good Christian man (by most accounts) - and a husband and father who read the bible daily and attended church way too much for my own good. And, although I had built up the formidable fortress of "right-thinking" that all good Christians must maintain, there were some hidden passageways or chinks in my armor - depending upon the metaphor you'd prefer. Because, to be a member of any self-identified group, there is a price to pay for that solidarity and communal...

Simple Joys Where does joy come from? There is, of course, no one answer and no simple one. The most honest answer is likely "It depends." It depends on who you are, when and where you are - and even why you are who, when and where. I'm not here to develop an exhaustive listing, instead I want to consider how to make joy more frequent - more pervasive - simpler. For reasons best explained elsewhere, I have spent my life focused on "the big things". The biggest thing was my near obsession with doing the "right thing" in the "right way". And, whereas there is nothing wrong with that in and of itself - some may even say it is admirable and lacking in the world as a whole - I find that it has personal consequences not often discussed. Of course, much of the matter depends on the why one would choose such a life. For me, it was my response to personal pain and as a prophylactic for the human condition and persistent melanchol...

One of Us What if god was one of us Just a slob like one of us Just a stranger on the bus Tryin' to make his way home Joan Osborne, One of Us One of the most compelling parts of the Christmas Story is the very everyday, humble focus of it. The story is about shepherds in the fields tending their flocks. The shepherds of that time were the immigrant farm workers of today. They were migrants without social stature performing an essential service no one else wanted to do. And Mary and Joseph were common-folk - the working poor of today - that were forced to deliver their firstborn child in a barn. And, the audacity of the whole story was that god came down from heaven and humbled himself to become a baby - the human most helpless, most tender and also the most messy. Babies are adorable - which is a good thing - since they are demanding little packets of screaming, eating and pooping. And the story says that god became this. So, here at this Chri...

Slip Slidin' Away God only knows God makes his plan The information's unavailable To the mortal man We work our jobs Collect our pay Believe we're gliding down the highway When in fact we're slip slidin' away Slip slidin' away Slip slidin' away You know the nearer your destination The more you're slip slidin' away Paul Simon As we go through life, if we survive long enough, we begin to develop a feel for it. When we begin, we are dependent, naked and unable to walk on our own. If we are lucky, we will have a safe and loving family that will feed us, clothe us, and nurture us in such a way that we will one day be reasonably self-sufficient. Along the way, there are things we learn. Some of them we know, some of them we feel. And some of them, we only suspect. As a child, we are sometimes read stories referred to as fairy tales. In those stories, there are sometimes magical animals, powerful wizards or wit...

Generally, I hate labels. Liberal, conservative. Gay, straight. Labels in most cases shrink reality and simplify truths that cannot be. Today, for some, even gender labels are too restrictive. If we are honest with ourselves, we are so complex, so variable, it might be more accurate if all of us referred to ourselves with the "Royal We". Recent studies focused on the biome of bacteria living in our digestive systems (i.e. - gut bacteria) seem to suggest that these living organisms secrete hormone-like chemicals that can impact everything from hunger to sex drive. And yet, I normally refer to myself as I or me, not they or us. And so I am reminded of the paradox that I am - that you are - that we are. Yes, I am me, but what about all those who have invested in me along the way? To what extent are parts of them affixed to - inserted into - infused into my psyche? But, I must admit, as an INFJ (Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judger), the Meyers-Briggs nom...

Insanity Albert Einstein, possibly the greatest mind of the 20th century, developed his famous "Theory of General Relativity". This theory deals primarily with space, time and matter - and how time itself is actually relative, not fixed. But, Einstein also did not shy away from the occasional opining on other matters important to him (hence the quote above). Yesterday, 14 people were killed in San Bernardino, California by a man and wife team armed with assault rifles and body armor. Last week, an angry middle-aged white male shot 12 people, killing 3. And, depending on when you read this (this all happened in late 2015), you are either non-plussed or shocked. I, myself, am both. Unfortunately, it seems that we, Americans, somewhat like that eponymous frog in the frying pan, are rather oblivious to the insane level of gun violence in our nation. The incremental rising of the toll - and its constancy - has numbed us to the insanity of it. And yet, ...