love the moment

meals, movies, Broadway plays can only be described - the who's, the when's and the what's. if the storyteller is good, you can almost see it. you can almost hear the sounds and the melody. but the place that even the best storyteller fails is in the feeling. "it was lovely" or "i was so happy" are dry bones compared to the living flesh of how it felt. the emotions of grief, sympathy and love run so deep and show that words are almost foolish in their attempt to convey the truth of it. the joy of finding a lost child, or lost love, or finding your own lost self in the midst of it all - is the sort of joy i mean. and words - alone - will not suffice. either joy or sorrow so deep that they nearly break a heart in two must be shared face to face. there must be touching and tears - and the fearlessness to bare one's soul. so many times we don't take the risk. the chance of deep connection - no matter how lovely - is always compared to all those ...

Muir Woods, Marin County, California November, 2005 the path we take, long sometimes winding and wicked leads us to that unexpected turning we did not see it how could we life is large but i feel small, sometimes my only cure is to let go follow my feet they know the way home

Franklin, Tennessee. October 26, 2009 what will you leave behind - once you've gone? what signs will remain to show that you were here? will you, like a storm, leave behind a trail of destruction and chaos? or like a spring breeze, will you have been only a momentary sigh - or a quickly forgotten smile? or, like a caring parent, will you have been that one who leaves a room a bit cleaner - a bit less cluttered - one who brings back some warmth and calm to a room's rattled nerves? or, better yet, will you be the healer, the builder, the one who births new and better things. one who seeks to always walk lightly through perfection, but who also never stops trying to better those things that need love and attention. or, in a more darkened tone, will you be only a tyrant, one whose words defame, whose actions destroy the beauty, the love, the good intentions of those with whom you disagree? The Limbaugh's, the Dobson's, the Beck's of this world have always been with ...

Radnor Lake, Nashville, Tennessee. taken 11/1/09 @ 12:17 PM. do i believe in God, you say? do i believe in Jesus, you ask? it depends, i reply. if by God you mean an angry god who is vengeful and angry - and ever-looking for people to punish - then, no, i do not. i once did, but - thankfully - i am no longer so weighed down and fearful. if by Jesus you mean American Christianity - espoused by TV preachers or neo-con Republicans demanding obedience to their narrow idea of holiness - one that debases everyone (but especially women, gays and illegal immigrants - then no. but if you by God you mean the joy i felt when my first daughter was born and i held her - only 5 minutes old - in my trembling hands. or if by God you mean the mercy and kindness i have been shown by good friends and lovers when i was desperately in need of it. or if by God you mean the growing capacity for love and forgiveness in my own heart - then, yes, of course i do. and if by Jesus, you mean the man of s...

Radnor Lake, Nashville, Tennessee. taken 11/1/09 @ 11:01 am. "...natural does not mean following random thoughts of the moment. Instead, it means consciously aligning our actions and decisions with spiritual goals so they become easy and effortless." p.223-4, re: ziran, or naturalness. from The Tao of Daily Life by Derek Lin

10/15/09 very odd. a call to my room at 11 PM and 4:30 AM. both times, the caller simply said "Time to wake up!" in a very cheerful voice, and then, hung up. was it a crank call - or some sort of cosmic warning from the universe? i am reminded of all those years of sleep walking. all those years of living a nightmarish dream from which i could not awaken. back then, i didn't even know what "awake" looked like. back then, i defined awake as only the progressive degrees of drowsiness. what is the cure for such a sorrowed slumber? even more important, yet, is how does the infected patient even become aware of their pitiful state? i wish i could tell you that it was a flash of enlightenment that arrived in Hollywood fashion - accompanied by soaring soundtrack and dramatically increasing light. but, it was not so for me, and i doubt it ever would be for any one. instead, as one who struggles to shake off the cobwebs of a hangover or the patient who - after seri...

"giving & receiving are one..." says Tao 27. and so it is. because giving is the beginning of the infinite circle of intention. it is the initial step in an eternal journey - the destination of which you do not know. because Tao 27 also says - "A knower of the truth gives without keeping account." and so they do. a knower of truth know that a fundamental foundation of all that is - is this simple maxim - you reap what you sow. you get back, what you give out. Jesus knew it. Lao Tzu knew it. That is why Tao 27 refers to this truth as: "The great wonder." "The essential mystery." "The very heart of all that is." And so it is. It is the first decision we must make as children. do we shout "Mine! 'Mine!" for all the world to hear - or, instead, do we open our hands to share our treasure with those we see? this early choice - which we are graciously allowed to revisit continually - sets the course of our life path. wi...