living

that inner ache
familiar and persistent has returned to me with a vengeance

that intense knowing, that expanded awareness of living and dying has sensitized my soul to the cost of living today

no thing is free and the proverbial piper must be paid for his playing - even if his song is not of my choosing

even though i can choose otherwise, why would i?

why ignore the lilting song, even though the tune is melancholy and dark

why would i ignore the call to dancing in the street, even if the light is only of the moonlit night, and not of the warm and bright tomorrow?

dance i must and sing i will - for i know the almost-dead living that comes from stilled feet and silenced voice.

i will not return to that castle dungeon - built as it is of cold hard stone - wet and dank and suffocatingly small.

no

i would rather sing even the saddest song and hum it forever
as a Free Man

rather than live still and quiet in the prisons of my own soul's fear.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Christina's World at Starbucks

There was the dark-haired girl by the window The strawberry blond with freckles behind her The brunette walking past me with an awkward gait Upon reflection Further examination revealed a permanently curled left hand All of this she managed quite well Good enough that only a poet would notice I, too, have a limp My soul is slightly twisted Bent from years of fitting in We all write stories of Contortion that mar the smooth babies We once were I wish I had known her well enough or Had been brave enough to ask How her delicate blend of Beauty, grace and deformity was born What triumphs and failures Have made her thus So many nights I wiped away a daughter's tears The soft sorrow nearly broke me Thank god I was able to adequately lie Don't worry, honey It's OK Everything will be all right And the mystery of the lie Is that it is also true How can we be both liar and sage How is it that we are both broken and whole Only the angels know How a painfu...
Read more

Now that's more like it...

Image
I'm watching the 2004 film "What the Bleep Do We Know!?" which stars Marlee Matlin, and deals with quantum uncertainty. A pretty heady subject for a Hollywood film, no doubt. All of my life, I had this feeling that was very hard to quantify. The feeling was that this world is all less real and more fantastical than anyone I knew felt. I remember in 8th grade when the teacher told me to refrain from touching the air conditioner's thermostat that I told her no one really touches anything. It is only the force of our electrons repelling each other. She was not amused. So, in this film, the ideas of quantum physics, quantum mechanics are discussed by several intellectuals who are quite enjoyable in both their appearance and their delivery. As each of them spoke, I had the distinct joy of "I told you so!!". That is not to say that I clearly understand quantum physics, I'm not sure anyone understands quantum physics. But, they did state what has been o...
Read more

Ask not for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee...

Image
John Donne's 400 year-old wisdom From Devotions Upon Emergent Occasions, Meditation XVII. In case you don't know much about John Donne, let's have Wikipedia educate us: John Donne (1572–1631) , English poet and cleric in the Church of England. He is considered the pre-eminent representative of the metaphysical poets. His works are noted for their strong, sensual style and include sonnets, love poems, religious poems, Latin translations, epigrams, elegies, songs, satires and sermons. Another important theme in Donne's poetry is the idea of true religion, something that he spent much time considering and about which he often theorized. He wrote secular poems as well as erotic and love poems. So, I'd like for you to stop a moment, and ask yourself: Can you imagine Billy Graham, Jerry Falwell, Joel Osteen, Pat Robertson, or any other Television Evangelist writing metaphysical love poems? I didn't think so. I ask this because I'd like to no...
Read more